New Maui Telephone Handsets Designed to Save Relationships on Vacations

Maui’s main landline telephone company announced a novel new plan to help reduce nagging between couples while visiting the island.

Mauian Telcom is installing new handsets to all the old public telephone stands remaining all over the island.

“Hello? Hello, Karen, are you even listening?” said a man from Portland into a halved handset in front of Times Supermarket in Kihei.

Later, a woman from Seattle could be heard saying to her significant other, “It’s almost as if you can’t even hear me!”

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The special yellow handsets are being installed through summer in three styles: Missing Output Audio End; Broke in Half; and Invisible (no handset at all).

So far, Mauian Telcom officials say the program already has saved dozens of relationships during vacations.

“We foresee thousands of relationships being relieved of unnecessary pressure due to our special yellow handsets,” said Miriam Ohno, spokesman for the telecommunications company based in Kahului.

“We even envision a new line just to dial in to business meeting calls.”