10 New Conspiracy Theories for the Kooks Gone Wild About Maui Fires

While Maui residents grieve over the terrible losses of life and property from the fire disaster, a plethora of conspiracy theory kooks are exerting an enormous amount of energy speculating about what it all really means.

Their questions and behaviors are sucking valuable time from leaders of the intense search and recovery efforts.

“You have to just shake your head at the selfishness of these folks, stuck on rumors and innuendo, or political speculation, which seems harmless, but ultimately it all takes time away from all the work needed in West Maui,” said Kai Smithson, aide to Gov. Josh Green. “Their inquiries can wait until we’ve at least determined the disposition of every person missing.”

To steer the conspiracy theorists away from the emergency work, Maui Insight offers the following conspiracies for them to investigate.

10. Did you notice profits for the Clinton Foundation rose after the fires?

9. The recycling center was spared.

8. Mainstream media (MSM) won’t give Woody Harrelson screen time to balance newscasts.

7. The burn area is shaped like a donkey head.

6. Willie Nelson’s house was undamaged.

5. The boats that burned offshore clearly were targets of space lasers.

4. The fires began Aug. 8, or 88, which is how you say good-bye while texting. That has to have something to do with the Great Reset.

3. Nick Sortor’s triple espresso at the Napili-Honokowai Starbucks was lukewarm.

2. All those houses burned down, but that big tree still stands?

1. The Governor’s name is Green! C'mon, man!