Teen Roundabout Driver’s Ed Course Pondered for Maui Middle School Students

Now that the state of Hawaii will build roundabouts pretty much anywhere regardless of student safety matters, local education officials are exploring a new driver training course just for younger, pre-licensed students and those pesky traffic circles.

Round and Round Safety Education 31A would help students who are just about old enough for regular driver’s ed training, in an effort to instill solid roundabout safety instincts before they actually receive formal teen driver training for regular roadways.

“Since it appears that roundabouts are here to stay, and will probably multiply since state transportation bureaucrats keep trying to win government bureaucracy awards, we better arm our student drivers with the best education possible for their safety and the safety of others,” said Joanne Poepoe, spokesperson for the Maui District of the Hawaii Department of Education.

The state DOE has purchased sit-down driving simulation machines to test students’ responses to a challenging course where the driver must navigate a constant left-turning bend while avoiding confused motorists zipping by from all directions, all at the same time missing high school students trying to walk across.

“We have to make it as difficult as possible because that new Kihei roundabout will be quite the doozy if they ever let high school kids cross there without an overpass or underpass,” Poepoe said.

The Kihei roundabout on the Piilani Highway (31) opened this year at the juncture with a brand new high school on the east outskirts of South Maui.

Even though the state education department promised a long time ago to build a pedestrian crossing over the busy highway in order for the new school project to move forward, DOE officials expended little energy in getting an overpass built.

That inaction resulted in a delay of opening the new high school, as the County of Maui refused to issue an occupancy permit due to pedestrian safety concerns.

County leaders resolved the matter by allowing the high school to open, but with an order that, until the overpass is complete, students can only be dropped off at the campus. In other words, no walking to school.

“Which will force even more drivers to navigate a roundabout that shouldn’t be there in the first place,” said Kirsty Sherman-Williams, a resident off Kulanihakoi Street, which feeds the roundabout from the west, opposite the new high school. “We love the new high school, thank you very much. But that highway is busier than the 405 through Santa Monica on a Friday afternoon. I wouldn’t walk across it as an adult. Just build the gosh-darn overpass already.”

State education officials continued to promise work on building a pedestrian overpass for local students to get to their own high school without the help of their driving parents, even though no funding nor plans exist to this day.

“We’re super serious about building the overpass,” said Horacio Wahahee of the DOE’s Advanced Infrastructure Planning Department (AIPD). “We hoped the county would give us a mulligan on this since it cost so many millions of dollars extra to build the school in the first place. Building an overpass is really hard.”

Meanwhile local middle school students invited to test the new driving simulators seemed to look forward to the course, which is anticipated to be held after regular school instruction.

“It’s just like Mario Kart except we only go left in small circles, and can’t shoot shells or drop banana peels,” said Edgar Spicoli, 12, of Kihei. “If we could shoot shells at numbskulls, it would make it way funner.”

“It seems like there should be a way to jump the car, you know, when someone blindly cuts you off due to the faulty paint lines in the Kihei roundabout,” said Joseph Rattner, also 12, of Wailea. “Now, it’s either stop, swerve, honk, or pray. Maybe drivers need a fifth option.”

If the testing proves successful, county education officials envision a 2-month middle school roundabout driving education course, complete with a roundabout etiquette section to learn how not to honk horns or flip fingers.

The new course would be dubbed 31A because it’s for the first roundabout on Highway 31 ~ and officials envision more traffic circles on the heavily-traveled route.

“There is thought of a roundabout right there when you get into town from Kahului, you know, where you have to turn right then get another intersection to turn left onto S. Kihei Road,” Poepoe said. “Or maybe one at the other end in Wailea to help people get to Monkeypod Kitchen for killa mai tais.”